Wednesday, Sept. 25, 2002 - 10:06 a.m.

I don't think spinsterhood will suit me so I'd better damn well get my act together in...let's say 10 years? Yeah as long as I re-marry by age 35 I'll be ok...ya think? Fuck it.

I'm having a bad day...can you tell?

I'm being really sarcastic...isn't this obvious?

I don't feel like myself. I'm not sure I care anymore. Honestly I just want to get the hell away from here and start a new life somewhere busy...where no one knows me. I don't know when or if that will happen. Right now I'm just guessing about every damn thing in my life. Nothing is for certain. But I'm at least trying to have fun. That is all I CAN do right now. All that eases my pain is NOT being alone and being surrounded with people who make me feel at least like a halfway decent person. I am really lucky to have such wonderful friends to KEEP ME BUSY doing something - anything - to keep my mind off S. I don't know what's up with him. I haven't heard anything about him from mom and dad in a couple of days so I am very suspicious. He didn't go have tests run Tuesday ... he is supposedly going one other day this week and not here - somewhere off the mountain.

I have somewhat of a faint hangover this morning making me really tired and just plain ol' yucky. Man... I really need to PULL myself together and start concentrating on losing 30 lbs before I lose my fucking MIND!!!!!!!!!!!!

Maybe it's much too late for that.

::Last Five Notions::
Happy but Bored - Wednesday, Apr. 20, 2011
Stepdaughter1 - Tuesday, Mar. 15, 2011
frack - Thursday, Dec. 23, 2010
t-day2b - Wednesday, Nov. 24, 2010
fraking fraked up - Sunday, Nov. 14, 2010

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